As I come up on t-minus 12 days to my first ever road marathon (That would be Boston), I am increasingly anxious. Most of my training (I am really uncomfortable with that word for some reason) has been pretty positive. A few of my longer runs were not so great but I had one or two that were incredibly encouraging. My everyday lunch runs have become increasingly faster to the point that I am continually shocked at my pace when I feel like I'm only pushing at moderate effort.
I'm confident enough in my fitness level that I will try for a sub 4hr finish time but, for some reason, I am terrified of this 4 hr number.
I am not afraid of failure as much as I am afraid that I will push to achieve it and miss out on the experience that is the Boston Marathon. I don't want my finish line photo to be a grimace of pain. I want to be smiling and jumping up and down and surfing on the energy of the crowd. I want to have a great time first and foremost and party the entire way. I want to remember Boston, not as a test of my fitness, but as a wonderful and happy experience.
The long runs are in the bank and the fitness level is what it is. The only thing to do now is sit and wait for Marathon weekend and pray for decent weather on raceday.